Make Believe

Hope sprung up like wildflowers from the soil of grief and the sun briefly came out from behind the clouds, for a little while I was happy.  I hardly knew him, yet I believed everything he said because he was so nice, so different.  I believed him because I wanted to believe it was possible to begin again, to love again. I believed him..and that was my mistake.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” He said.
“Only time will tell.” I whispered.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

“I don’t know how to separate my body from my heart.” I whispered quietly into the dark.

“You seem sad.” He said.

“I’m afraid.” I whispered.

“What are you afraid of?” He asked.

“That you are just going to take and leave.” The words barely escaped my lips.

“That’s not my intention at all.” He reassured.

“Sorry I’m just really busy with work.” He said.

“It’s okay, I understand.” I said.

“Sorry my phone ran out of battery all day.”
“Sorry, I have other plans tonight.”
“Sorry, I can’t…”
“Sorry.” He said.
Silence

“Oh…”

3 Comments

  • Reply
    Paradie Stewart
    April 17, 2018 at 2:41 pm

    All the feels!!! Your combination of photos and dialogue make this such a powerful and poignant experience to read. I’m also entering a new relationship…and I’m f*cking terrified. He is “so different, so nice”, just as you experienced. I’m trying so hard to set my boundaries and not let someone else’s affection for me run the show or set the pace…

  • Reply
    JJ
    April 17, 2018 at 5:42 pm

    Powerful

  • Reply
    Brittany Farmer
    April 18, 2018 at 1:41 pm

    You are worth so much more. You are cherished by a Father who absolutely adores you. You are treasured. You are bold. You are loved.

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